Guilt

Guilt is an emotion typically seen as negative. It’s like a flame that grows and grows when fanned. If left unchecked it can consume the host like an unwelcome parasite.

But can guilt be healthy too? Sometimes guilt tells us when we’ve F’d up or crossed a line. We feel guilty so we find that person and apologize to them. But if we’re only sorry because we feel guilt, are we really sorry at all?

Is guilt necessary? When we feel guilty and are under a lot of pressure, guilt is almost like that strict parent that won’t tolerate you not toeing the line. In that case we are like a small child that just wants to receive love from its parent but can’t right now because the parent is disapproving of them.

Guilt can be a destructive emotion and I know that first hand. I used many things to help cope with my guilt. While I don’t self-medicate anymore I still feel guilt for things that I do from time to time.

That’s why I’m writing this post.

If it was a learning experience then what do I have to feel sorry for? That was then and this is now. I’m not the same person I was a few minutes ago. We are constantly changing and morphing. Why still do I beat myself up about this? Is guilt something inherent in humans or is it taught to us? I believe I feel guilt because I’ve proposed a certain standard for myself. A bar I have to reach. When I fall short of that I criticize myself as if that is going to help me do better next time. I’m being the parent in the scenario while simultaneously being the child. It just doesn’t make sense.

If I simply brought compassion and understanding into the equation, the guilt would be absolved. Why do we make it so hard to love ourselves?

If you saw someone struggling, I mean truly struggling, with no help and it’s not their fault what they’re going through… Would you judge them?

Why then do we judge ourselves constantly for the things that we do?

Why can’t we just accept that we are flawed and all have shortcomings?

This stems from a deeper societal problem but I fear going into a tangent.

I made this post so I could release the guilt I was feeling somehow and come back to my real self. I hope someone takes away at least something from this post, you never know if they are the exact words someone needed to read.