What will become of me?
Uncertainty grips me and a ticking time bomb is formed in the pit of my stomach
Tick tock… Only moments until it spontaneously combusts.
This worry, this anxiety, is it necessary or is it something I may discard like a used tissue?
Why am I so fearful of something that is only in my body?
And why do things have to go my way ever time? Could things be perfectly fine not going my way?
Why do I need to have a control on things and what do I hope to get in return?
Also, why do I need the answers to these questions or is this another attempt at obtaining control?
My worst fears made true… Them not approving of me. Me being abandoned and cast aside like a cigarette butt out of a car window
My worst fear is being forgotten. If I’m forgotten then what becomes of me? What will happen? Who am I and what am I here to do?
I’m afraid I’ll have nothing. Nothing to fall back on. No security. No sense of comfort. Just utter loneliness.
Let me feel this void a bit longer because something tells me something is trying to come through.
Life is teaching me something and there’s still a lot left more to learn.